The next time you go to say to your player or child: “Believe in yourself”, stop 1st and ask yourself this key question:
Based on the situation and their history in similar situations, is it possible for him/her to have self-belief?
If it isn’t, by telling players to believe in themselves we add more difficulties to their experience e.g., “I should be able to have self-belief and I can’t”
Instead, normalize their lack of self-belief and change your statement to: “I believe in you”
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